Nine of Swords

 “In the night, a sleeping figure lies trapped in a dark, nightmare world existing on the edge of sleep. Strange demons, repressed hurts and childhood fears range freely. […] This is a lonesome place, far from help and comfort. Shadows of pain, suffering and depression overwhelm the sleeper until she becomes a victim of her own thoughts and, like a martyr, repeatedly impales herself on their hurtful points. […] The only way she can escape from these nightmares… is to open her eyes and awaken to what is really bothering her. She must confront it in broad daylight…. The alternative is torment.”

 -monte farber 

What is the strength of your dedication?

“Nines, because they are the final single digits of our number system, represent completion and finality. They are the culmination, the summing up of the sequence of numbers. Nine is a magical number of the Moon Goddess and relates to the wisdom of the Crone (or Hermit) in the Tarot…The Nine of Swords represents a ghastly nightmare, the rising up from the unconscious of all the fears and projections the mind has made during its process of thought. Worry and anguish have become overwhelming terror, an experience of despair and even cruelty or physical pain. All the unchecked fears and negative thoughts have accumulated to form what Jungians call ‘the Shadow.’ These fears may stem from childhood traumas, repressed hurts and wounds from anytime in life, or images projected by the culture one lives in. The twisting path shows the morass of confusion surrounding the issues that cause doubt and fear, the sense of difficulty as one awakens to this mess of anxiety and ‘demons.’ The rising up of this Shadow may keep a person from sleeping or give her physical symptoms of illness.  Although demons come from the unconscious, they can be fought by conscious intention. Part of the personality cowers in terror, hands covering her eyes, refusing to look at or deal with the problem, immobilized by fear. The other part of the self rises up in strength and confidence–ready to confront the Shadow. Power flames from the sword that appears in front of the heroic part of the personality, which reaches out with her right hand to grasp this tool of liberation. The only way out is through the pain and fear, through a confrontation with one’s monsters” (Motherpeace 186-7).

(no action is the danger here)

 "Pain is of life. To reject it is to reject life itself."

~ Havelock Ellis 1859-1939

"The trick is in what one emphasizes. We either make ourselves miserable, or we make ourselves happy. The amount of work is the same."        ~ Carlos Castaneda 1925-1998

Six of Discs

love generously

"Life forms illogical patterns. 

It is haphazard and full of beauties which I try to catch as they fly by, 

for who knows whether any of them will ever return?" 

~ Margot Fonteyn 1919-1991

-six of silly hats from "uncarrot tarot"

what is given freely comes back twofold

Choose what is beautiful

Choose to have meaning

I build my life in choices

Four of Swords

strongly intended time out

In this protective environment, one may gain the sense of non-attachment necessary if the personality is not to feel lonely or abandoned.  -motherpeace

"The authentic self is the soul made visible."
~Sarah Ban Breathnach 

"People are hung sometimes for speaking the truth." 

~Joan of Arc 1412-1431

"Rest is for the weary, sleep is for the dead."  
~Doctor Who

 

rhyme over reason over rhyme over reason

Four of Cups

-julia wolfson

The four of cups represents a time for getting clear, refining things down to simple truth.  Feelings are hurt. Things don't feel quite right so, it's time to figure out what's wrong and change it.  The personality needs to strip itself bare and undergo a cleansing.  The figure has turned her back on us in a temporary rejection of help from others--her work must be done alone.

 

ISOLATION

The water from the river that flows into the ocean will be her helpmeet.  Carefully, she steps into the cold stream and begins to wade across, letting the current wash her clean and revitalize her emotionally.  Perhaps when the figure has completed her ritual, she will lie on the warm sand and imagine new possibilities.

She has entered a time of uncertainty, like the place where the river and the ocean meet, where fresh waters swirl into the salt.  This time can be used for re-evaluation of life and relationships.  If there are tears, they can fall unseen into the water, allowing a free flow of feelings that will heal all wounds.

-motherpeace

 

 "full of themselves"

Dreaming up new and exciting conquests is sort of like dreaming up new and fantastic animals...

...Activities that demand discipline and endurance, such as exercise or meditation, may turn out to be the key to silencing those hissing, preening doubts, one beak at a time.

-arcanalogue

I have lost; what is your world to me?

The Four of Cups is never satisfied...it has discovered form, and water has no shape other than that of the vessel it is poured into; and water moves in cycles, and cannot be kept in one place forever.

Fours of Cups differ, but tend to have three full vessels and one empty one - sometimes poured away, sometimes thirsting to be filled. No form can hold the entirety of your feelings and language. Write a poem, and you have a vessel, but you can only hope that this vessel can hold your feelings - perhaps by tomorrow, or by the time you show the poem to your friend, it will be empty again.

This card is discontent, clearly because it does not appreciate its full glasses, or the boundless flow which has filled them and will fill them again. There was a time when I was 'well, duh' about this card's situation, thinking it should just turn to the river, but...loss is loss. This card is mourning - for some feeling put into a form which has now shattered. Or perhaps for a glass crafted with such care, never to be filled.

There are layers of lessons here, but there is a time to disregard all of them. Yes, be grateful for what you have. Yes, trust the world to give you more and more to feel, to say, to express, to love. Yes, you shouldn't obsess over what you don't have, or no longer have. But damnit, there's a time for this. It is a moment when, because your words and feelings have taken form, you find there's not enough, or that what may be brought by the rushing river is nothing compared to what you have lost. Yeah, I'm sure you can be a super-aware thing and see what is in each glass as non-individual, as simply water this water in this cup, but the world is not like that; we have, we hold, and we lose, because cups break and water flows away.



Water is tears.
Given time and attention, confusion will sort itself out and clarity will return.

-motherpeace tarot